Happy birthday Julia!

My little girl is now four. The night before her birthday I told her she would be four when she woke up in the morning. She was all excited, but at that moment it struck me that she wouldn't be three anymore and I started to cry. She held my hand and said, "Mommy, I promise I'll stay four for a long time." There she was comforting me! I guess turning four means she is growing up and moving out of the baby/toddler world. She will be starting preschool for the first time this year and I just enrolled her for dance lessons. Four opens up a whole new world for her. I'm sad to see those baby years end for her but so excited to see what four brings her. She is so beautiful, smart, and funny. It seems I waited forever for my little girl and now here she is turning four already.

I was reading a post tonight about someone who is having difficulty conceiving. I remember those days all too well. Those days, months, and years just seemed to crawl by. At the time I didn't understand why it was happening to us. Why couldn't we just get pregnant like everyone else? Why did we have to endure so many tests and shots and procedures with what seemed like endless phone calls from our clinic saying "sorry but you're not pregnant". But now looking back I have been able to make sense of it all. If we had gotten pregnant any sooner then it wouldn't be Nicholas, Julia, or Gianna. They were all meant to be here. God was trying to tell me to be patient, but I was trying to control it by the tears and anger and frustration. In retrospect, I wish I didn't spend so much time in tears and worrying so much. It wasn't until my last IVF cycle that I decided to kiss it up to God and let Him take over. I was trying to control something that was uncontrolable. We were doing all we could.

Now our three children are the center of our lives. Life is unfolding as it should, and we couldn't be more blessed.

Birthday madness!

My house is out of control. Yesterday was the kids' birthday party. I invited fifteen kids and only one didn't come. Now what I didn't think about while doing the invites was how many presents we would end up with....28 presents, which ironically is my favorite number. Maybe I better pick a new favorite number. Our toybox is already overflowing all over the floor. Where on earth are we going to put all this stuff? And of course most of the toys need batteries.

I think I'm going to scream!!!

Our Mae Mae

I love to run my fingers through those curls. Everything about her is just so cute...her tiny toes and tiny fingers, her big Buddha belly, and her squishy legs. I love being with her and actually get sad when it's time for her nap or bedtime. I love how she says "mama" for absolutely everything. At 16 months she has learned some words like "hi", "bye", "cracker", "papa" and she even said "marshmellow" once. She understands everything now. I'm so glad Mae Mae is part of our family. We are blessed.

The lazy hazy days of summer.

Nicholas got a new fishing pole for his birthday from his Dad. Here are a few pictures of the kids trying it out.

My friend Patty

Patty has taught me what friendship is all about. She is always there for me...never voicing her opinions too strongly. She always knows exactly what to say at the right time but more importantly what not to say. I feel like I'm constantly a work in progress when I'm around her. I can depend on her for anything and that is such a comfort. What would I do without her?

Jimmy Buffett

How much fun did we have??? Hmmmm....

Happy 5th birthday Nicholas

I cannot believe my baby boy is five. Wasn't it just the other day when we were trying so hard to have a baby? We went through endless doctor appointments, testing, and IVF cycles. I had so many shots my butt was numb! But it was all so worth it. It happened when it was supposed to happen. If it were any sooner then it wouldn't be our Nicholas.

He is such a love and tells me over and over again throughout the day that he loves me. He gives me the biggest hugs. Oh how I love my baby boy....

Quote of the day

Nicholas said after being good to Gianna, "Mom, if I'm good, will you give me dollars"?

One word....Ogunquit

If we change one thing then it changes everything...

Today was my Aunt Dottie's funeral. She raised six awesome kids who are now grown with children of their own. As her daughter Maureen said today at the funeral, she was so fortunate to see all her children grow up and know all sixteen grandchildren. My uncle and my cousins believed in my aunt's faith, so much so that they seemed quite at peace with her death.

At the cemetery all the grandchildren released pink balloons and we all watched them until they were tiny pink dots in the sky.

My Aunt Dottie crocheted me a blanket for our wedding thirteen years ago and it has become my favorite blanket to snuggle up with on the couch while I watch TV. It has also become a favorite of my kids too. She loved to bake and made this incredible swedish braid bread. I would always look forward to it at Christmas. She gave me the recipe after mine went "up in smoke". (Long funny story.) She was just so pleased to pass on the recipe to the younger generation and see us actually bake from scratch.

God saw you getting tired
And a cure was not to be
So he put his arms around you
and whispered "Come to Me"
A golden heart stopped beating
Hard working hands at rest
God broke our hearts
To prove to us
He only takes the best.

I will miss my sweet Aunt Dottie.

Canobie Lake Park

What a day we had yesterday! We went to Canobie Lake Park and the kids had a ball. They went on lots of rides. I'm so happy that they have not outgrown the kiddie rides yet. They look so cute riding them. I actually went on a roller coaster by myself. And little Mae was awesome per usual. She sat in her stroller most of the time just taking in the surroundings. Not one tear or one complaint from her. Actually Nicholas & Julia were great too. Very little complaining. Then it was off to the water park. That was so much fun! I haven't gone on a water slide in years. I'm so glad Danny and I are able to just join in on the fun with the kids. Nicholas is fearless. He just goes all the way up to the biggest slide and off he goes. Julia on the other hand hates to get her face wet. You get completely soaked going up to the slides. Buckets of water get dumped on you. But it was so much fun! By this time we were starving so we went to the Rainforest Cafe for dinner. I think they both were a little nervous at first of the alligator and other creatures but soon they were fascinated. They ran around taking pictures of all the animals and fish. What a great day. I love the summer!