Elite Performance Challenge

Julia performed her two new solos last night and they were beautiful.  She dances from the heart and really knows how to move an audience...

And I love that her friends came to support her...so sweet...

Out of 43 solos, she placed 6th with "Lost Without You" choreographed by Hope. Top Ten is always a good thing...

Lost Without You

Set Me Free

Remembrance Day

It was a beautiful tribute

We are grateful to have the opportunity to celebrate the amazing human being who was our mother, Shirley Joan Surette Smith, surrounded by the family and friends she cherished most. We wish to extend our heartfelt gratitude to all who supported us these past two months and comforted us this past week. We are eternally grateful to Old Colony Hospice; they were truly angels in our time of need. We would like to offer a special thank you to Anna Flowers for connecting us to our spirituality on this special day. Thank you to Fred Cahill, our brother, for the gift of you and your beautiful artwork, in honor of Shirley today. And before we begin our tribute to Mom, we would like to acknowledge the loves of our lives: our spouses, Dena, Paula, Chieko and Danny, and Shirley’s beloved grandchildren, Tyler, Nicholas, Julia, Justin, Zachary and Gianna. Nana loved you all with her all of her heart. 

For Mom

There is no love on this earth quite like a mother’s love. This morning, Kerry, Ricky, Dini and I would like to share with you a little bit about the unique and magnificent brand of our mother’s love.

But first, we should rewind a bit, to the time before we were born. Mom was born to Evelyn and Harry Surette on Catalpa Road and lived in Norwood all of her life. She spent her childhood playing and roaming her Baker Street neighborhood on roller skates with her best friend Thelma. Mom must have been a pretty rambunctious girl, because the most repeated stories from her childhood had to do with a swing set that led to her broken nose and a horse that led to her broken arm.

Mom moved to the Washington Street house as a young teen and it has been the home of her heart ever since. Her mother was loving and generous, and they were as close as close could be. Mom always referred to her mother as the best friend of her life. Second only to her mother was her dear friend Lorraine, and when Lorraine moved in with the family, Mom was no longer an only child. It meant the world to Mom to have a sister, and she and Lorraine cultivated a once-in-a-lifetime friendship that lasted to this day. Mom’s dad was a photographer and a great adventurer. He encouraged Mom to sit with her legs dangling over the bow of his boat while he skimmed across the ocean waves at a pretty good clip. He was also probably responsible for Mom’s fear of flying after he took her soaring above Norwood in his private, 4-seat plane. He took Nana and the girls on many adventures to Cape Cod and the coast of Maine and bought Mom a convertible when she graduated from high school. So we think it’s fair to say that Mom was pretty spoiled, mostly by love.  

Mom met and married our Dad, and after a brief stint on Cranmore Road, they moved to our Nahatan Street home to raise us. This brings us back to the unique and magnificent brand of our mother’s love.

 As far back as we can remember, when we were very small children, rather than criticize us for our mistakes, Mom showered us with praise whenever she caught us doing something good. We were raised on this kind of positive reinforcement all our lives. She taught us many things, but there is no question that what she valued most was to teach her children to be kind and compassionate human beings.

Growing up, our house was filled with music and creativity. Mom was super fun and had the best imagination ever. A rainy day was never boring in our house. Our mother was a gifted artist and writer, so we drew and painted, wrote poems and plays, and then acted them out. Our mother was a supremely talented musician, so there was a lot of music and dancing happening in our home at all times. A favorite memory is Mom sitting at the piano, hammering out the chords of her favorite original tune called, “Dini wants pierced ears (and she’s not old enough to get them)”.  But we all agreed that of the golden memories of our childhood, our favorite one, and the one that brought the greatest comfort, is when we would hear Mom in a nearby room, harmonizing with her John Denver records.

And Mom was an entrepreneur, back when moms of the late 60’s and early 70’s weren’t expected to be so brave. As soon as the four of us were school-age, Mom opened a children’s consignment shop with her friend Dot Whitney and they called their store the “Children’s Clothes Closet”. They ran a hugely popular and successful business together, and we recall many stories of both wonderful and crazy customers.

But as kids it never felt like she was away from home, because she closed the store in time to be in our kitchen to greet us after school each day. Every evening at the supper table she asked, “What’s the Oldham School news today?” and would listen intently to everything we had to say. In this way, she made us feel special and gently guided us through the challenges of growing up. Only the question changed over time, from, “What’s the Jr. High North news?” to “What’s the Norwood High School news?” But she never, ever tired of listening.

Our mom was a hit with our teenage friends because she extended that same interest and care to them, welcoming them into our home - often a dozen or more at a time, pretty much all day all summer long - and she became a second mom to many. Every so often she’d pile us all into our family station wagon and drive us to the cottage on Lake Archer to swim and ride around in Grampy’s catamaran boat. Our friends learned quickly that it wasn’t just Chopin and John Denver she loved, but she was a rock ‘n roller, too, an avid Led Zepplin fan, with an extensive collection of Zepplin, Aerosmith, Guns and Roses and Metallica records. So she fit right in and we had the best time together. It wasn’t until many years later that we picked up on the wisdom of opening her home to all those kids - she always had one eye on what we were up to. And she genuinely loved our friends.

It probably goes without saying that Mom was our #1 fan at all of our band and dance events. We remember her sitting in the audience, not so very discreetly, with a humungous silver boombox to record our performances. When we graduated from high school, Mom encouraged us to chase our dreams and be courageous in pursuing the lives we really wanted, not a life that anyone else wanted for us. 

By the mid-80’s, Mom and Dot had closed the shop and Mom took over as the accountant for Kerry’s dance studio. To this day, students and parents of the studio continue to talk about her and how she touched their lives in a myriad of ways. By now you’re probably not surprised to learn that Mom was wonderful with kids of all ages, but she had a special place in her heart for teens, especially those who were in trouble and needed guidance the most. Mom began volunteering for an organization called Birthright, where she was a hotline counselor for teenagers over several years. This led to her to her most cherished vocation, foster parenting.

As a foster mom, Shirley gave her love unconditionally and without judgment. She extended the patient, compassionate love we grew up with to her foster children, mostly teenage boys, who arrived at her door with everything they owned in a single paper bag. These boys and girls often came from dire circumstances, and our mother, the essence of a humanitarian, opened her door to provide them with a safe place to live and someone to love and care for them. In retrospect, it is quite remarkable that she had the courage and strength to do this, because by this time our parents were divorced and Mom was on her own.  Fred Cahill, who she loved dearly, was her very first foster child; his picture has remained on her mantel to this day. She loved each child that came to her with compassion and understanding, never wavering when others may have questioned her judgment. Perhaps the greatest testament to her commitment to fostering is Glenn Bastow, who lived with Mom and our family long beyond his foster years. She gave him the experience of family love that he never had. To see Glenn’s joy on Christmas morning is all we would ever need to know that Mom did the right thing by becoming a foster parent. Mom will be buried next to Glenn today.

The four of us can tell you that knowing Mom only got better as we became adults. She relished the birth of each grandchild, and they filled her heart as she watched them grow. She loved whenever Tyler came to visit from Florida, and they were pretty much inseparable until it was time for him to go back home. It’s really important for you kids to know that Nana could not have been more proud of each and every one of you. And she also adored our spouses; they were very close to her heart. In fact, we had some good laughs over the past few weeks watching Mom completely perk up whenever Danny, Paula or Dena walked in the room and said, “Hey Shirl”.

We continued to learn and laugh with our mother until her very last day with us. Here are some really awesome things about her:

·       Mom profoundly believed in living in the moment, cherishing the very moment you are in. She found peace in this, and it became a motto that guided her life.

·       Mom was intrigued by the natural world around her and saw beauty everywhere she looked. It was actually kind of hard to go for a walk with Mom, because she stopped so often to examine the distinct beauty of a fallen leaf, or marvel at the age and texture of a piece of tree bark, or express her wonder at the shapes and patterns of the clouds in the sky.

·       Mom was an incredible optimist. She believed in the hope that the rising sun will always bring. Her favorite piece of advice was that “Everything will look better in the morning”. And about that, she was unfailingly right.

·       Mom was a marvelous self-entertainer, because making time for happiness was a top priority of hers every day. She loved to spend time with family, it was her everything, it was what made her life full. She loved to laugh with us, be silly, and have fun, because she wanted nothing more than for all of us to be happy, too. If Mom saw something in a store that “made her happy” she bought it, or if she saw a stone on the ground that “made her happy”, she picked it up. Of course the only problem with this is she could also never throw anything that made her happy away, so she’s got a lot of trinkets in her home. But there is no question they have the desired effect - you can never stop smiling when you look at them.

·       Mom appreciated the simple blessings of her life. She was never a “grass is greener in someone else’s yard” type of person. Whenever one of us drove with her through town, Mom would look at the lights on the common and the majestic Town Hall and say, “Is there any place prettier than Norwood?” Without pause, we would answer, “No Mom, there really isn’t.”

·       Mom loved her animals. She had a number of pets in her lifetime and they brought her great joy, including her current, beloved cat, Mikey. And anyone who knew Shirl at all knew of her tremendous love of horses. Every single birthday of her life she blew out the candles with her eyes closed tight, wishing for a horse of her own.

·       Mom was the best back-scratcher in the universe, the master of twirling a cool damp cloth to place on our foreheads when we weren’t feeling well.

·       She cried easily, and it was a beautiful thing. Because it always came from a place of compassion and empathy, the very best of her.

·       Mom was ageless. She had a youthful presence about her all of her life that was truly inspiring.

·       Mom believed in God.  In recent years she said would always say, “If I go today, don’t be sad, I’ve had a good life”. And she meant it. She said she looked forward to going to heaven, where she imagined one has the ability to go anywhere you want in an instant, so she could be with us, anywhere we might be. We would joke with her just please try not to spook us. But what we were really thinking was, if there was ever a person with whom God would be deeply, deeply pleased, it would be our mom.

Mom would want the final piece of her eulogy about her love for the four of us. No one will ever love us as fiercely as our mother. She saw what was beautiful about each of us and told us…every time she saw us.

Mom relished even the tiniest joys of our daily lives, and she cried with us for our every sorrow… she continued to smile with us, and comfort us, and touch our faces, and hold our hands… until her very last moments on earth.

All of her life, Mom loved picking out sentimental, meaningful gifts for us, something that would represent a feeling or a memory that would last forever. In the end, the ultimate gift she gave to us was herself. Her presence and inspiration will always be among us, and we will carry the light of her within us forever.

We know, as sure as we stand before her, Mom would want us to bask in the sunshine on our shoulders, breathe in the sweetness of the day, appreciate the love of those who are here with us, and smile and laugh through our tears. With this in mind, we will close with the joyful words of her beloved John Denver:

Welcome to my morning
Welcome to my day
I'm the one responsible
I made it just this way

To make myself some pictures
See what they might bring
I think I made it perfectly
I wouldn't change a thing

Welcome to my happiness
You know it makes me smile
It pleases me to have you here
For just a little while

Welcome to my evening
The closing of the day
I could try a million times
And never find a better way
To tell you that I love you
With all the songs I play
Thank you for allowing me
Inside this lovely day

And the last gift I gave her...a picture of horses...

To my beautiful Mama - My Joy

Dear Mom,

As I’ve been looking around my house these past few days, I’m finding all kinds of little gifts that you have given me over the years.  And I’m positive there are more that I haven’t even come across yet. I know it is your way of giving me those little gifts again from you.  It’s been so comforting…that ring you gave me years ago that’s been sitting in my jewelry box alongside that little wrapped present magnet with the poem…to the beautiful owl on my cabinet in my bedroom that you colored for me for my birthday in all my favorite pastels.

I happened to look at my bookshelf yesterday and saw that book called “JOY” you gave me…because when you saw it, you thought of me. Inside the cover you wrote “Dini, one of the biggest Joys’ of my life”. 

I’ve been asking myself the past few days how I am going to handle today and tomorrow.  I’ve been reading my wonderful book by Louise Hay every single day for over a year that is filled with beautiful daily affirmations.  And how funny...while sitting by your bedside these last few weeks, I opened your nightstand drawer and inside you too have a book of daily affirmations.  Like mother like daughter.  Most of the entries I have dog eared are about “thoughts”.  About how we are in charge of our thoughts and how a thought can be changed.  It’s something I’ve been working on daily. And how much do you want to bet…that was God preparing me all this time for this very day…how to think and what to think about today and tomorrow.  Because I’m writing this letter to you on your first Remembrance Day. (That’s what I’m calling them by the way.)  I’ve been telling myself…and praying about it…that I want to be filled with JOY today and tomorrow.  I will be surrounded by those who love and care about me but more importantly…those who love and care about you. And you know what Mom?  Today I woke up with a slight grin…isn’t that crazy?  The very day I’ve been panicking about.  Strangely I feel almost calm.  I know it’s going to be OK.  I know I will be OK.  I will take it “one day at a time” as your favorite motto says.  You always surprised me at how you could do hard things…and I can too. 

You always tell me what a good Mom I am…and I always tell you that I learned from the best. 

I will miss our dinners at Friendly’s…I will miss our shopping trips to Pier One…I will miss laughing with you until there are tears…I will miss hearing you say “my Dineenie”…I will miss you telling me “shhhh…you’re my pretty one”…and saying goodbye at your back door...and you telling me you love me.  That is just seven of a million things I will miss. 

Nothing will separate us Mom.  Nothing.  Ever.  We will always be connected.  I told you that in your last hours and I hope you heard me.  I picture it as an invisible cord…just like the umbilical cord that connected me to you…we will always be connected and together.  Always. 

On the first page of the book of JOY you gave me it opens with “prepare for joy”.

And the book ends with this…

“Some people are so much sunshine to the square inch.  Be joy”

And that describes you perfectly.  You will always be MY JOY. 

I will love and miss you all the days of my life.

I love you my beautiful Mama.

Mom's remembrance

Shirley J. Smith

NOVEMBER 13, 1934 – FEBRUARY 21, 2020

link to play video

Shirley J. (Surette) Smith of Norwood, passed on Friday February 21, 2020. Born November 13, 1934, she was a lifelong resident of Norwood. She was the daughter of the late Harry and Evelyn Surette. Shirley is survived by her loving children, Kerry Smith and her wife Dena Wessler of Norwood, Kimberly Smith and her wife Paula Stanton of Norwood, Richard Smith Jr. and his wife Chieko of Norwood, Dineen Digiacomo and her husband Daniel of North Attleboro, and six adored grandchildren: Tyler, Justin and Zachary Smith of Norwood and Nicholas, Julia and Gianna Digiacomo of North Attleboro.

Shirley co-owned and operated a children’s consignment shop, the Children’s Clothes Closet, in downtown Norwood. Later Shirley worked as the accountant for her daughter’s dance studio, the Kerry Smith Academy of Dance Arts. In this role she became a friend and mentor to many students. She volunteered at Birthright of Norwood as a hotline counselor for several years, leading Shirley to her most cherished vocation, foster parenting. Shirley opened her home to provide teenage boys and girls with a safe place to live and the opportunity to experience the joy of family life and unconditional love.

Shirley was a talented artist and musician, a passion she passed on to her children. Nothing was more important to her than family and laughter; she was a woman with an unfailingly positive outlook and an extraordinarily kind and gentle heart.

Visitation will be held on Thursday, February 27th from 4 to 8pm at Gillooly Funeral Home, 126 Walpole Street, Norwood. Funeral service will be held on Friday, February 28th at 10am at Gillooly Funeral Home, with interment to immediately follow at Highland Cemetery in Norwood.

In lieu of flowers, contributions may be made in Shirley’s memory to Home for Little Wanderers thehome.org.

Last Game #31

Nicholas played his last high school hockey game last night.  The season didn't end the way he wanted it to as they lost in the first game of the playoffs.  But he had an amazing season.  We are so proud of him...but more importantly he is proud of himself.  We are so sad to see this chapter of his life come to a close and are hopeful it will continue next year.  We'll have to wait and see how that plays out.

Look at this awesome picture of our boy...

Last warm ups and intros...

My heart

My beautiful Mama.  I hope she's at peace now.  She passed at 12:30 a.m. today.  The sadness is crushing.

Love is All

My Nana (Mom's mom) wrote this poem for my Mom way back when she was a teenager starting to date. I just found it in her nightstand. Very wise words and so appropriate for this time and space we are in right now...

Shirley - Love Is All

Love is happiness

Love is sorrow

Love is the foundation 

Of a perfect tomorrow

The closest to heaven

Until God's call

But the only real reason 

For living at all

A picture of my beautiful Nana...and my Mom's writing "One Day at a Time"...sit next to my Mom's bedside...

From my Daniel...

SAVE

We got this really nice email from a dad from the opposing rival team, Bishop Feehan, about the game Friday night.  He's been Nicholas' coach along the way and his son has played with Nicholas for many years.  So it was a huge compliment.

"So proud of Nick.  Played great!  Excellent game. Here's a series of photos stopping the break away. Thought you'd want to see."

HUGE SAVE!!!  And here's the video of it...

and more big saves...

Before the game...

and the very end of the game...we had FOUR boys in the penalty box!  Hysterical!!

It was Nicholas' last game of the regular season (he does have one more but it doesn't count) and then on to playoffs.  This game against Feehan didn't end at all as we had hoped but Nicholas was AMAZING in net.  He made a ton of great saves and really saved his whole team from going down with the ship. Ended 3-0.  He really only let up one because the second goal was very controversial as it was a high stick deflection and the last one was an empty net.  Funny how they had an empty net for quite a while and it took them forever to get the puck in.  : )   So the game was terrible but we couldn't be more proud of Nicholas.  I prayed before the game that he would have an amazing night to remember and he really did.

The last pasta dinner...

So proud of the boy #31

There are no words

Lifelong friends

Thoughts

"What you think, you become. What you feel, you attract. What you imagine, you create."

Encouragement

I have to fight through the bad days...and oh boy there are so many these days. I so wish I could just hit the rewind button...but I can't...so...

Teenagers - puts it into perspective

When I think of it this way I realize how short a time it is with my teenage babies...

Pregaming

Only a few games left.  I'm feeling sad about that.  I wish the season were longer...

The Boy